tonight, i think of you
tonight, i cry.
i've read thousands of quotes.
and i only thought of you.
tonight, i shall tell myself
i shall pretend that i've let you go
tonight, i promise myself that i won't go back to holland
tonight, i promise to stop taking iniative.
tonight i shall only let myself know, my feelings never changed
tonight i shall let only myself know, that you never once loved me
and the only lie i'd love to hear from you is
i love you
i love you.
i wished for many things, and im still wishing
i know you're just using me
but it's okay
i agreed to that.
becuase you never realised how much trouble i went through.
just to spend that 2 nights with you.
it's ok, because you never really appreciated it
the only thing i regret, was not giving one tight hug, and whisper i love you, i wish you did too.
it's okay,
i'm fine now.
you can stop pretending you still like me.
you can move on, no wait
you already did.
just stop making use of me, so obviously.
that's all i asked for.
good night yi sheng.
i miss you.
enjoy your trip.
ytd was the last night.
although i wish it will never end, but it's okay
they say, sometimes in life, you have to let go of people u never wanted to let go.
i think i understand what it meant.
because i kept cursing you
but i still went to find you.
i still tolerated your temper
funny huh. why? i don't know.
yi sheng, you'll never read this.
but somehow, i still wish you could.
because i want you to know, how much of an asshole you are.
because i never said much about me n him and what i've been doing.
doesnt mean i've never tried and stuggled.
and you don't know how tired, upset and lonely i felt.
because each time i thought i could turn to and lean on you.
you let me realise, you were never really there.
but it's okay.
i'd still love you.
because i think it's okay to let you hurt me.
at least i got to love you one, got you to like me once.
that's the difference.
yi sheng, i cant stop calling your name.

hi bloggerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
hi nobody
i wan to learn how to dance hip hop
but i think i won't make it
haha!
because im fat n my movements all so rigid
maybe i can try popping instead of hip hop .ha!
anywayyyyy
i wann slim down leh
im been so lazy
sian sian sian sian sian sian sian sian sian sian sian sian sian

i miss clubbing
i need to go clubbing
if boy cant think of what to do for christmas
im gg to abandon him n head to zirca
i dun care
i need to club
i wan to flirt around leh
i wan to enjoy some time on my own
PLEASEEEEEEEEEE


ayumi hamasaki so pretty!
boa dance so well!!

and omg ! joshua =(
forget how to spell his name liao la
his spelling so different one
i want to stay in touch with him even after he discharge leh
he not very good looking
but the way he treat his family, o gentle !
he's such a nice guyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAA
okay thats a side track


my main point for today
BOA DANCE SO WELL
I WAN TO BE LIKE HER!

hi blogger.
just suddenly feel like talking to an empty space for a moment.
my boy is growing up,
he says he wants to open a pet shop and now it's becoming real
i hope it really becomes a success
bcuz i secretly wan my bf to be a boss with his own shop and earn lots of money
i wan my bf to be able to rbing me out for shopping, overseas, fine dining n bla.
anyway, im 18 already
been clubbing behind his back
hahahahah !
so sad he doesnt know anything
but oh well, i love you la okay .
i also nv anyhow here n there what

anyway,
im pretty confident that none of my friends reads this space at all
so i shall write all i want
this is gona sound damm funny but i went to look at friendster just now
saw some comments which made me feel so ..
don;t know how to desccribe
just kinda regret why i didn't hold on to all my friendships or relationships more

like alphonse, he has a gf now
how sad for me
ya la im attached too, but still i enjoyed the attention he gave me when he's single
like how he care when i broke up with ym bf for a short while that time n stuff
how he cheer me up, sms me n stuffs
kinda miss him alot
been wanting to talk to him a few times
but well, since he got gf, forget it._.
cannot talk close to him also. sian sian sian

eric, this fuck shit didnt come to my bday chalet.
so sian
kinda miss him and all his msgs telling me he still love me
but then too bad, im attached
cant enjoy all these attention too long
and maybe he got new sweetheart liao
LOl
hope he rmb me forever. ahahaahh

shawn, dun noe where the fuck he die to
probably one of the most regretful r/s i didnt cherish long enough
still rmb how i like you so much, but just did not have the courage to dump my boy n be with you
how we used to go out, sleep on ur shoulder
and how you post on ur blog about our outings
sian sian
dunoe u got sweetheart now anot
but whatever, dun tink u'll ever want this fickle bitch mom liek me anymore
sian sian,
i still like you la hor bastard. but i love my boy
aiya whatever, im fickle la kay
wadever u wnana think
this is really how i still feel
shoudlnt have give up you las time. knn

xiao xin
also another boy, i fucking regret
btu oh well, u n ur gf so happy
so i also nv even talk to u at all now
you wun even care if i die infront of you now
miss the way you dote n protect me so much
ahaha friendster n webcam n msn those days
epic!
BUT U ALSO ONE FUCKER LA KAY
knn you like my friend.
so i hate you hahahahaah
fucking hongster
still, i wish u treat em as ur baobei and still continue to care n dote one me
really miss those times
but aiya sua, you heartles freak.
shall not miss you anymore knn

jerald, you are one fucker that i cna say i completely dun care about u anymore. haha !
bye bye

esmond, you fucker
can be so fucking annoying
but then i still miss you alot la okay
i know im bad to you for alot of times
but then i really still miss you some times
cuz you are always so damm caring n gentle to me no matter what la kay
dun noe am i still ur most loved and unforgettable girl not
but fuck it la kay
i know i also canoot enjoy such attention anymore la hor

eugene, yu are really a big time fucker la okay
i dun miss you anymroe but i enjoy those days that you are my fling la kay
but still i hate you lol
such a flirt but well
would still wanna go club with you .
bye bye

i think tats all for now.
friendster bring back so much memories
anyway although i feel safe that no one reads this space
but i secretly hope tat the boys will read this space. HAHAHAHAHAH!!
okay im retarded
but im so happy to type all these shit and know that no one reads
yay

although i feel so loved everyday n i know how much me n my boy love each other
i still wish im single now, with total freedom
clubbing n pubbing every night
earning alot
with a slim body
and have many boys after me. hahaha !
oooops yaya flirt or slut or bitch whatever
i happy what can u do right ha
i still wanna flirt around n make friends leh sian
i wanna be free !!
maybe i shall flirt behind .teehee!

i know i'm not a good girlfriend anymore.
i know how i've been treating you
i'm sorry, but its a habit now
i don't really know what to do
i've tried to speak nicer and tried changing my temper.
but i'm actually just supressing everything.
i don't like it, i'm not happy
but you're happy too.
i want you to be happy.
i've been happy long enough.

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PRADA IS SO MAD GORGEOUS !
i'm so getting the prada wallet, picture is not up here though.
a pink long one !

A diary planner , a book to write whatever i spent & "save"
a new file , new stationary , new bagS
NEW CLOTHES & SHOES

and i'm ready for school !

still saving for my wallet ;(